I was like a bull in a china shop, knocking women down like bowling pins in my attempt to find my next love.
I recall meeting a charming woman at a cafe who when I told her I was recently separated said to me, “Call me in a year or two,” and walked out.
They feel their way through their misfortune and often don’t date for several months and in some cases, years.
When I was 30 I got into dating a week after separating, and while I had been unhappily married to an alcoholic, I didn’t take any time to consider my role in the failed marriage or the grief I felt about it.
Now of course, a person who is avoiding their feelings will just find someone else to avoid them with but somebody who is genuinely interested in you and wants to start off on a good footing won’t mind respecting your wishes – at least they’ll know that they’re pursuing something with you because it’s they want to be with as opposed to seeking a distraction that’s going to backfire when they realise that they’re unavailable. Of course some people are separated or even divorced numerous times due to shady behaviour or due to a tad too much Fast Forwarding but that’s stuff you’ll find out through due diligence, possibly quite quickly if you have your feet on the ground and are listening and watching. I know of somebody who is getting married for the fifth time and is doing their best to hide it from their family including their own children – yeah, clearly they haven’t grown or learned a damn thing from their previous marriages. Don’t enter into an involvement with your emotional airbag inflated.